🇨🇦 The Making of TerkinByDesign

 

“Yes it will be a grace if I die. To exist is pain. Life is no desire of mine anymore.”  ― Sophocles, Electra

To start off and jump right in, it’s been awhile since I have done a post here, especially in my own words, but this story has been called upon to be known.

High School Grade 10
1978

I have been asked many times why I do what I do, and why it matters to me, you don’t have any kids to worry about their future I’ve been told. Some even demanded I stop what I am doing, it’s none of my business very firmly.

I am sure that once you finish reading you will have a better understanding of why the fight for equality and equal rights for LGBTQI2SI people, these issues I hold close to my heart because I’ve been there and take the hatred sorta personal now.

I now consider the LGBTQI2SI community as a distinct society,  why? well to answer that I will have to take you back to 1979, when I was at the ripe age of 19.

A time when I’m not liking myself or the life ahead me very much, especially after witnessing what the local town folk referred to as the town queer being beaten by youth many times and how they enjoyed it, but myself no better to stand there and watch while the reality of what I would have to face was far to clear. I would pray as often as I could asking God to change me because I was terrified of what I was and life in general.

Towards the end of the year, late September I scored an Employment opportunity in Labrador City working as a payroll clerk in the mines for The Iron Ore Company of Canada (I.O.C) which temperately occupied my thoughts. I did not understand why I was not attracted to girls, not because I couldn’t get them, not to boast but I had lots to choose from but avoided all of them.

I was determined not to live a gay life and just decided I would forget all about it and started dating one of the my girls friends. But the attraction to boys does not go away, I found myself always looking at the boys and this made me hate myself even more because for the most part it was how I felt after a gay encounter, at which time swearing it would never happen again, so I can relate totally and understand completely why we are so ridiculed and rejected by society.

After a encounter with a first timer, also a friend, he himself had the same reaction which was not a good scene and lead to a pretty nasty fight. The next night at a party with some friends and having way to many beers I left the party alone and went to my sisters, well to my surprise the friend had paid my sister a visit and blamed me for forcing him to have sex, long story short he would end up my secret lover for many years to come until he contracted the HIV virus. Now living in the gay village in Toronto watching all my friends dying around me was the most trying time, I again wanted and was waiting to die. I decided to go back in the closet and left the village and moved to North York a Toronto suburb.

Anyway back to my sister’s place and that dreadful night, she was very upset and said she was going to call and tell our Mother, at that point I was sick to my stomach, I did not want anyone to know especially not my mother. I decided at that instance that I wanted to die and grabbed a knife that was just in front of me on the Kitchen counter top with a 8 inch blade and viciously rammed it into my abdomen (laymen terms Stomach).

Waking up three days later in hospital, wrapped from head to groin unable to move in a room with two other guys. It would be a week before I was back on my feet and another week before I was released. During the week I was bed ridden I got a visit from my brother in law, he said your sister is in this hospital too, a couple rooms down, I asked why, he replied, the trauma from you stabbing yourself in front of her, she had a miscarriage and turned around and left.

I believed that my punishment for failing was now beginning and now wished I was dead. The day before being released I had to see a psychiatrist, the first question he asked was, “Why did you try to kill yourself?” of course I lied, I would not dare tell him the truth. He responded by saying you are very lucky, I did not ever think it was possible, It is amazing how you managed to drive a 8 inch blade all the way into your abdomen and miss every organ causing no serious injury, your free to leave when ever you choose, I was ready and left for home from his office.

Upon arriving home, still living in Labrador City I called my mother whom was in Stephenville, told me to just come home. I returned home, found a girlfriend and was Married six months later, never to ever talk to anyone about what happened to date, and I woke up still not dead again today. 😀

So the moral of this story, it’s twice as hard for us to accept who we are then you, when you are hated for who you are, live means little, but with everything inside us we know 13521856_10153520444411890_1311783879739607533_nwe cannot change, left with only a few choices, live life to the fullest in the closet and marry, sneak around for a bit hoping not to be discovered , those of us that do not consider the closet an option will live an authentic life as who we are and fight to the dead, and the worst is sadly two many of us convinced or brainwashed hate who we are so much rejecting life turn to suicide. So the next time you meet or see someone from my community, try showing a little kindness and or respect , I don’t think that is really a lot to ask, with sincere Thanks for your understanding.

“I attempted Suicide, it failed – I got married, it failed – Then I started Fightin” – Terry.K

Article by Terry.K posted February 15, 2018

footnote:  TerKinByDesign in reality has nothing to do with designing, only that of who I am

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🇨🇦 St. John’s Pride “Together”

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We are excited to announce today that Pride week 2018 will be July 16th-July 22nd, 2018. It is also today that we are announcing that the theme of this year’s Pride is “Together.”

08-17-2015-prideThe 2018 board of St. John’s Pride Inc. is working hard to bring you a pride that is bigger and better than ever. Hitting the ground running, we hope that we can keep this commitment to you.

Pride is a time to celebrate, memorialize, and rejuvenate as a community to continue the fight on our journey to equality for all LGBTQ2SI+ people here in Newfoundland and Labrador, across Canada, and throughout our global world.

This year it is time for the LGBTQ2SI+ community in St. John’s – and of course, this invitation extends to all those Newfoundlanders and Labradorians across the province, and wherever they might find themselves, as well as all of their merry friends – to simply come together.

Together, this year, as a community, we have achieved great successes:

Moral success in the form of an apology from the Government of Canada for the historical failings of successive Canadian governments and systemic persecution of LGBTQ2SI+ Canadians, as well as the largest settlement awarded for state wrongs towards the LGBT community in the world;

Legislative success with legislation being passed by the Government of Newfoundland and Labrador to allow individuals to change their designation on a birth certificate to Homophobia-Now-That's-a-Choice-Rainbow-Pride-Barfemale, male or non-binary;

And electoral success when Virginia, former journalist Danica Roem, a Democrat, knocked off 13-term Republican state Del. Bob Marshall, Virginia’s self-proclaimed “chief homophobe,” and sponsor of the first notorious bathroom bill; Danica becoming the first openly transgender person elected and seated to a state legislature in the United States.

All of these things were achieved when communities came together, through the hard work of individuals who brought us these historic victories for LGBTQ2SI+ people everywhere. These are shining beacons of success, proof of what can happen when an engaged and supportive community comes together.

 

B Girl ValentinesThere are disagreements in our community, and differences in how we think that we should continue down our path to equality.

And while those differences are important to acknowledge, and discuss, and while pride is and always will be inherently political, our hand is extended in our work; in the organizing of St. John’s Pride week 2018, in coming together during this week, and, always, in supporting each other as a community, in our togetherness.

Whatever togetherness might mean to you, know that there is always room at our table, in our circle, and in our community for your Pride. Together we are stronger; together, as the LGBTQ2SI+ community, we are not simply better, but we are at our best.

We struggle together. We rise together. We are proud together.

Simply, Together.

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🇺🇸 Artist of The Month “Steve Grand”

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Steve Grand (born February 28, 1990) is an American singer, songwriter and model from Lemont, Illinois, a Chicago suburb. He became an overnight internet celebrity and o-STEVE-GRAND-ALBUM-COVER-570was acclaimed by some to be the first openly gay male country musician to attract mainstream attention in the United States. The music video of his first hit “All-American Boy” went viral on YouTube in less than a week in July 2013. This attention landed Grand on Good Morning America, CNN and other national media. On Good Morning America Steve shared how difficult it was for him to come out to his parents as a high school student—saying with obvious emotion “I felt like I was a shame to my parents and that there was no way I could ever make them proud.”. Buzzfeed ranked the video on its list of the “24 Most Brilliant Music Videos from 2013”, and Out magazine named Grand to its annual “Out100” list of the year’s most compelling LGBT people. In addition to being a musician, Grand has become an active figure in the LGBT equality movement.

Steve Grand release an acoustic version of “We Are The Night”, a track off his debut album All-American Boy, and thanked his followers for their support.

Speaks Steve on the track:

“So for every boy and every girl / No matter who you love / And for all my trans brothers and sisters / Of every race, in every place around this globe / It’s our time / We will rise”

Writes Steve on Facebook, and offered some life advice at the same time:

Thank you to everyone who has supported my work in any way these last (almost) 2 and a half years. It means more to me than I can express.

I am grateful for not only all the enriching experiences your support has brought me, but also for the challenges I have grown from. I am the person I am today because of those experiences and those challenges, and (though I have not always been able to say this honestly) I am at a point where I know I would not have it any other way. Because what choice do we have anyways?

He’s Back! Steve Grand Releases New Single “Walking”

Steve Grand is gearing up to release album number two and has dropped the first single from the said album

Steve Grand_Walking_Single Cover_option2_v1Steve Grand has brought out some new music that we definitely can’t get enough of. “Walking” will become the first single from his second studio album; written and recorded all by himself; he also co-produced the song along with Tim Palmer. A lyric video showing behind-the-scenes clips was also released alongside the single. He has also revealed that a music video will follow soon.

The album is planned to be out in a few months. This first single is a fun and lighter tone compared to other album tracks, which will dive deeper into emotions. The single is a charity single for the first seven days, with 100% of the proceeds going to Rainbow Railroad.

The song reminds us of the jovial tracks from his debut album such as “Whiskey Crime”, “Stay”, and “Soaking Wet”; the latter of which was never released as a single and therefore never got a music video, much to our dismay; however, we happily support new music from this singer-songwriter instead….continue reading »»»»»»

Watch The Lyric Video To “Walking” By Steve Grand below

Article Posted June 13, 2017 by Jonathan Currinn for Celeb Mix

Click here and shop SteveGrand.com

All American Boy – MP3 Digital Download

Digital MP3 file of Steve Grand’s NEW single, Walking!


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🇬🇧 Prince William Tipped For Straight Ally Gong At British LGBT Awards

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“Carry out a random act of kindness, with no expectation of reward, safe in the knowledge that one day someone might do the same for you.” – Princess Diana

prince william & chuckiePrince William looks set to be honored at this year’s British LGBT Awards.

Following his history-making appearance on the front cover of Attitude magazine last year, in which he spoke out against homophobic bullying among young people, the Duke Of Cambridge now looks set to bag the Celebrity Straight Ally award when the ceremony is held later this month, with a source even suggesting he could be putting in an appearance.

An insider said: “Wills has become a bit of a surprise ally of the LGBT community after passionately speaking out against homophobic bullying. It has won him legions of gay fans.

“His support could see him picking up a British LGBT Award next month and I know awards organisers are working with Kensington Palace to secure him for the ceremony.”

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Alongside his cover shoot with the gay men’s lifestyle magazine, Prince William also gave an interview, in which he said: “The young gay, lesbian and transgender individuals I met through Attitude are truly brave to speak out and to give hope to people who are going through terrible bullying right now.

P William & Smilie“Their sense of strength and optimism should give us all encouragement to stand up to bullying wherever we see it.

“What I would say to any young person reading this who’s being bullied for their sexuality: don’t put up with it – speak to a trusted adult, a friend, a teacher, Childline, Diana Award or some other service and get the help you need. You should be proud of the person you are and you have nothing to be ashamed of.”

The Egale Canada Human Rights Trust

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Founded in 1995, Egale Canada Human Rights Trust is Canada’s only national charity promoting lesbian, gay, bisexual, and trans (LGBT) human rights through research, education and community engagement.

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OUR VISION

tumblr_n7vgfoxgte1sp6e2vo1_r1_250Egale’s vision is a Canada, and ultimately a world, without homophobia, biphobia, transphobia and all other forms of oppression so that every person can achieve their full potential, free from hatred and bias.

OUR PROGRAMS AND SERVICES

chuckie-newfoundlandThe Program & Services Department promotes and fosters the human rights and equitable inclusion of LGBTQ people in community, schools, and work through consultation, programs and services, training & development and community engagement.

Learn more about our Programs & Services

OUR RESEARCH

The Research, Policy & Development Department compiles, produces and communicates the best-available evidence, information and tools for promoting and fostering the human rights and equitable inclusion of LGBTQ people throughout all aspects of society.

Read articles from our Research, Policy Team

OUR OPERATIONS AND STEWARDSHIP

boygir2lThe Operations & Stewardship Department establishes efficient processes and procedures to ensure that Egale activities meet the organization’s objectives; to effectively manage day-to-day operations and resources across the organization; to bolster fundraising efforts and relationship management; and to monitor adherence and compliance to CRA reporting and regulations.

Learn more about our Board of Directors and team here.

Up coming Events

OUR HOUSING EFFORTS

Egale Youth OUTreach offers individual counselling, homelessness and suicide crisis services for LGBTIQ2S youth up to age 29 provided by three full time counsellors.

EYO opened its doors to service in 2014 in downtown Toronto and is hoped to be a model to bd_pridespread across the country.

Homophobia, Biphobia, Transphobia, violence and harassment in our schools, in our families and in our communities combined with experiencing homelessness and other stressors take their toll on mental health and overall well-being. We have created Egale Youth OUTreach to help address these challenges by providing direct services to LGBTIQ2S youth.

Learn more about Egale Youth OUTreach

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Learn more about The Eagle Canada Human Rights Trust

Learn more about The Eagle Canada Human Rights Trust on facebook


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LGBT rights’ forum held in Sutton

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“If anybody can find someone to love them and to help them through this difficult thing that we call life, I support that in any shape or form” ~ Will Smith

congrats-smileyFollowing on from the successful Marriage Referendum in May, the passing of the Gender Recognition Act and the recent amendment of the Employment Equality Act to give better protection to LGBT teachers, Minister for Equality Aodhán Ó Ríordáin held a meeting in Sutton recently to discuss the next steps for LGBT equality in Ireland.

5924263878459392Brian Sheehan, the former campaign director with Yes Equality and director of the Gay & Lesbian Equality Network (GLEN), and Anne Marie Lillis, chairperson of INTO LGBT, joined Minister Ó Ríordáin as guest speakers.

Minister Ó Ríordáin said the Marriage Equality Referendum was a huge moment in Irish life.


“I am very proud that Ireland is the first country in the world to vote for Marriage Equality by popular vote,” myDSm21he said.

cfbc18782436b6029da11f87a5ef9e0a“The meeting was an opportunity for local activists who had worked hard on the Marriage Equality campaign to comment on what they believed were the next steps for tackling the difficulties faced by LGBT people in Irish life.

“Attendees at the meeting highlighted other recent successes in addressing LGBT inequality including launching an anti-homophobic bullying campaign in schools, the passage of the Gender Recognition Act and the Children and Family Relationship Bill 2015.

99d95fe418930b0111e276e416755ffd“There was also a huge support from the meeting for my recent amendment to Section 37.1 of the Employment Equality Act to give LGBT teachers and medical professionals greater protection in their workplaces.”

Minister Ó Ríordáin added: “The meeting provided for a lot of food for thought and I look forward to pursuing the Equality Agenda and working with local activists in the years to come.”


1st January, 2016 ~ Article by Pat O’Rourke


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Garden State Equality’s Andrea Bowen honored with Pride of Essex Award

NEW-J


leslie-knope-gif “Don’t mistake people who don’t understand for people who aren’t willing to learn.” — Georgia Baber — Girl Up Leadership Summit teen participant

Garden State Equality Executive Director Andrea Bowen, center, celebrates following the Supreme Court’s June ruling legalizing same-sex marriage nationally Andrea Bowen
Garden State Equality Executive Director Andrea Bowen, center, celebrates following the Supreme Court’s June ruling legalizing same-sex marriage nationally Andrea Bowen

Happy-Smiley-smiley-10682479-390-222It’s been a busy year for Garden State Equality Executive Director Andrea Bowen.

This weekend, Bowen will celebrate her first anniversary at GSE, having joined the Montclair-based civil rights organization after starting her career as a social worker and transgender rights activist in Washington, D.C.

Garden State Equality Executive Director Andrea Bowen, center, celebrates following the Supreme Court’s June ruling legalizing same-sex marriage nationally Andrea Bowen BUY THIS PHOTO

A year in, Bowen describes New Jersey as a complex environment, one with many hardworking individuals looking to make a difference in their communities. Much of the past year has been spent meeting with community activists, including youth leaders, Bowen said.

Buy this image
Buy this image

She credited New Jersey students for bringing issues such as the need for LGBT-inclusive materials in health classes to GSE’s attention.

Bowen said she counts LGBT-sensitive training at schools, working with hospitals to provide LGBT-competent care, and training homeless shelter staffs to develop programs to work with homeless LGBT youth among the initiatives she is most proud of so far.

Essex County officials showed that they are proud of Bowen’s work, too, presenting her and state Sen. Teresa Ruiz with Pride of Essex County Awards during last week’s Essex County LGBTQ Pride Month Celebration.

Essex County Freeholder-at-Large Brendan Gill, a Montclair resident, said that the recognition of Bowen was well-deserved.

“I think she’s continued to hold up the legacy of Garden State Equality as an organization,” Gill said of Bowen. “Under the leadership that Andy has shown, GSE continues to be a real force and advocate for lesbian, gay, transgender and bisexual issues … I think we’re lucky to have Andy in that leadership role and [GSE] in Montclair.”

Gill told The Montclair Times that Essex County is unique in that it is one of the few New Jersey counties to have a LGBT advisory committee. He said the LGBT advocacy community is a large part of the fabric of Essex County.

Gill credited Bowen and GSE for its civic engagement and advocacy efforts, along with for Monday’s GSE-organized protest outside the Glen Rock office of U.S. Rep. Scott Garrett [R-5], in response to Garrett’s support of the First Amendment Defense Act, which prevents the federal government from taking action against individuals who claim to be acting in accordance with their religious or moral beliefs.

“I was really honored that they were excited about the work Garden State Equality is doing now,” Bowen said of the award. “This is an award that is partially for GSE’s legacy. [GSE founder] Steven Goldstein, [former Executive Director] Troy Stevenson, staff and volunteers built this. I was proud to carry the mantle.”

th_smiliesleepingBowen said she is focused on GSE’s future work. In the coming year, she hopes to address insurance discrimination against transgender individuals, provide better resources to shelters that serve homeless members of the LGBT community, particularly young people, and support LGBT youth in schools.

GSE is conducting an informal survey to see what New Jersey schools are doing to address bullying, establish gay/straight alliances, incorporate LGBT-inclusive health classes, and allow students to use the restrooms for the gender they identify with.

“If, in a year from now, we have changed the policies in schools to be more LGBT-friendly, I’d be a very happy woman,” Bowen said.

Bowen said she was also excited to have the support of U.S. Sen. Cory Booker and U.S. Sen. Robert Menendez, along with several New Jersey congressional representatives, for the Equality Act, which bans discriminatory practices against members of the LGBT community.

“I can’t wait to see it move through Congress and finally become law,” Bowen said. “In so much of the country, you can get married one day and fired the next.”

Praise for Bowen

MiLGgL7pTSince GSE helped pave the way for marriage equality in New Jersey two years ago, rallying public support has been a challenge, according to Steve McIntyre, a member of GSE’s board. Marriage equality was the clear focus of GSE’s first decade of existence, he explained.

“In the post-marriage climate, it was important for us to get a leader that was completely dedicated to the non-marriage issues,” McIntyre said. “To find a leader like Andy, who is trans herself, and who’s young and energetic and she’s been in the trenches … We’re thrilled with her accomplishments in her first year.”

GSE’s board remains committed to advancing LGBT initiatives through both legislative and judiciary channels, McIntyre said, and is proud to have Bowen’s work recognized.

“We are happy that she is being recognized for the important work she is doing – taking the lead on trans advocacy in addition to youth homelessness issues and eldercare issues in the community,” McIntyre said, referring to the Pride of Essex Award.

In an email to The Montclair Times, Brian Edwards, coordinator of The Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer Center at Montclair State University, lauded the county for honoring Bowen.

“I am a huge fan of Andrea Bowen’s work and commend the Essex County Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Questioning Advisory Board for recognizing her with a Pride of Essex Award this year,” Edwards wrote. “Andy is a change agent, and LGBTQ+ New Jerseyans are so lucky to have her at the helm of Garden State Equality.”

On the campus of MSU, one of the major focuses for this year has been removing transgender restrictions from student health insurance plans, Edwards wrote. Effective Aug. 15, MSU students will join students at TCNJ, Kean and Rowan in having accessibility to gender confirmation surgery, he said in the email.
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The LGBTQ Center is working with campus administrators on developing inclusive policies regarding chosen first names and gender markers, Edwards added.


Article by ANDREW SEGEDIN – STAFF WRITER | THE MONTCLAIR TIMES


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